Thanksgiving Dinner

Thanksgiving dinner is never the same day twice. For as long as I can remember, the people sitting around the table each year changes slightly. Some faces are there year after year, and others are limited one-time engagements. Technically, this is Sawyer's second Thansgiving, but his first actually in his own seat at the table. My dad usually says the blessing just before we eat, and he gets choked up every time. He truly is thankful for one more year, one more day as a family together (which is another story for another time). It wasn't planned in advance, but Benjamin ended up saying the blessing this year. It's amazing how just a simple prayer from a three-year-old can be so humbling:

"God is great.
God is good.
Let us thank him for our food.
Amen."

I couldn't have been more proud of him in that moment, and yet I'm sure he had no idea of the magnitude of his words. After I cut up his turkey for him, he dove right into his Thanksgiving feast without a care in the world.

I learn so much from my boys. I shouldn't take life so seriously all the time. We're not here for very long, and I want them to have good memories of me. I want them to remember having fun and being silly with them. I am so thankful for the time we've had together and I want to have many more years of Benjamin and Sawyer saying grace for Thanksgiving dinner. No matter who else may or may not be at the table with us...

Mister Pumpkin vs Mister Turkey

Singing songs is a prerequisite in preschool. With Benjamin, I don't get much information about the daily events at preschool, but occasionally I get a glimpse of how much fun he is having. For example, last week, we were sitting at the table on Sunday morning eating breakfast before going to church. Without any prompting or explanation, Benjamin broke into song:

(To the tune of "Where is Thumbkin")
Mister Turkey, Mister Turkey
Big and fat, big and fat
I'm going to eat you
I'm going to eat you
Just like that
Just like that

I cracked up because I had never heard this song before. Up til now, this tune had been reserved for singing "Mister Pumpkin," which happens to be sung to the same tune:

Mister Pumpkin, Mister Pumpkin
Eyse so round, eyes so round
Halloween is coming
Halloween is coming
To our town
To our town

Now Benjamin has sung both songs, and we're not sure which is his favorite. I vote for Mister Turkey for the comedic factor alone when you first hear it. I think he just gets a thrill out of our reaction to him singing, and for us, it doesn't really matter in the end. It's just comforting to know that he is absorbing the world around him and enjoying the things he experiences at preschool.

Finding His Feet (and His Fingers)

Sawyer found his feet! Well, it happened last week sometime, but they've been getting in the way of me changing his diaper ever since. He's been grabbing onto them with his little chubby hands and holding on for dear life. I don't think he even realizes at this point that those cute little toes belong to him.

He also has gotten into the habit of sucking on his two fingers. I have tried to tell him, and have Benjamin show him (since he's a thumb-sucker) that the thumb is a much better option. But Sawyer chooses to do it his way. Now I know a lot of parents and experts would tell me that I should discourage them both. My feeling is that I am saving a lot of money on missing "binkies" that way. You don't usually leave your hand laying on the table at a restaurant or have to pick it up 100 times off of the floor at Wal-Mart like you do with pacifiers. As long as he isn't up at the alter on his wedding day sucking his thumb, I'm not going to get overanxious about it.

Sawyer Gets His Own Activity Center

Email I received at work from my honey:
Found all the pieces to The Activity Center... I put it together, after spraying and wiping it off with clean & play. I put him in it and he loves it. His feet can touch the bottom. I think it will take some time before he will understand the idea of turning to play with each of the toys in the saucer. I took his picture and he was all smiles.

Now this is one of those happy milestones: goodbye swing, hello activity center! His brother Benjamin loved playing in it, and I know Sawyer will enjoy it, too. Now it's our turn to start passing on the baby paraphernalia. That will make room in the shed for more man-toys, or maybe some patio furniture. Oh happy thought!

The first day of the rest of your life

There are defining moments in your life that you never forget: the first day of school, the first kiss, graduation day, your wedding day, the birth of your first child, the birth of your second child, your first actual home purchase. These are expected milestones and events that you look forward to with anticipation.

And then there are the events on the flipside. The ones no one talks about except in hushed whispers: cancer, car crashes, the death of a child. We don't speak about these things because they are the unimaginable horrors that we wouldn't even wish on our worst enemy.

So when my son was diagnosed with autism two months ago, it rocked my world in the same way the "unspeakables" do. He's still my son, he's still the same person he's always been: sweet, loving, and a little bit of a goofball. But now he's got this big "A" on his chest, and it has changed the course of our lives in an instant. My calendar is filling up with meetings and evaluations. I have begun to learn a whole new language of acronyms that would have left me baffled a few months ago: TSS, BSC, Wraparound, bio-medical. I am overwhelmed by how topsy-turvy our lives have become.

And while I'm still trying to wrap my head around all of this, I realize that it is not the end of the world. There are so many others out there who have been dealt a hand much less optimistic than mine. I guess it's mainly mourning the loss of the "happily ever after" picture I had in my head for my son. The "happily ever after" can still be there, but the vision of what that will be has certainly changed at this point. It's all still so fresh...and hard to accept.